Updated: Apr 20, 2020
Trauma will show up at least one time in our lives. It can be anything from an abusive relationship or losing a loved one. If you are reading this post, you know about trauma. Post-trauma felt impossible to heal. You may have asked yourself, "How am I going to do it?" "How am I able to live or move forward?" It hurts mentally and physically. A pain in which you have never faced. It is overwhelming. You are not alone and it has impacted many women.
Here are the four R's to move forward following a traumatic event.
Rest- Your body and mind are exhausted. You don't need to take part in your daily activities. You require time off from work and need to decrease responsibilities. Your body has been in the stress response mode too long and now needs time to rest. Without rest, you will continue to spiral into the darkness of despair and your immune system's power will decrease. You may experience physical pain in body aches and you need to allow peace. What does this look like to you? Does it mean more sleep? Meditation? Not listening to the news? Not interacting with anyone? How about listening to soft music with a diffuser of essential oils? Choose your quiet space to get the rest you deserve.
Release- Purge any emotions that are bombarding your mind. These are uncomfortable and exhausting emotions such as anger, despair, shame, or sadness. It is natural and okay to release these emotions rather than repressing them. The more you repress, the more those emotions brew and will manifest in physical pain or emotional responses in daily life.
Recover- When you have gotten a grip and acceptance of your traumatic event through rest and release, the true recovery begins. Your recovery takes time, patience, and a lot of self-compassion. The world seems like a different place now. It may seem unsteady, cruel and you have to maneuver to find your way again. Recovery is personal to each person. It is a journey you have to face and allow to pull you forward. How can you get past from blaming yourself or others? You have to start rebuilding trust in your world. This will be a struggle but will become easier every day. Realign with a new purpose that is important. Perhaps you will help others to recover from the same event. What are activities that can bring a smile to yourself again? Who are people or groups that can bring compassion or courage to your recovery? Recover on your terms and speed. This can be a daily practice.
Resist- Resist the urge or impulsivity to do something self-destructive. This can be anything from impulse spending, quitting your job, giving away possessions, meeting with people who are not at your best interest, or not taking care of your physical or mental being. Resisting is important at the beginning of your post-traumatic phase. This is where impulse control is crucial as you may regret the decisions you make. Especially decisions about your livelihood. Give yourself several months before making major life decisions.
Thanks for reading this post. Make sure you take charge of your mental health. If you need help, contact a therapist. All health insurances cover mental health, and if you are a cash patient, the therapist should provide a discount. If there is a support group in your community, check to determine if it will be useful.
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